Country Wisdom

[Jack fowler]

I just got this Via E-mail; I don’t think anyone has posted it, if so, my apology.


1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...neither works.
4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
5. Always drink upstream from the herd.
6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.
8. There are three kinds of men: The ones who learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.
9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.
12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

ABOUT GROWING OLDER...

First ~ Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

Second ~ The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

Third ~ Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

Fifth ~ You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

Sixth ~ I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.

Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.

Eighth ~ One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.

Ninth ~ Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

Tenth ~ Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft.. Today it's called golf.

And finally ~ If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.

[jostev]

That's a funny one Jack

Johnny

[John *.?-!.* cub owner]

13. It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to say something and remove all doubt

[Ron L]

13. It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to say something and remove all doubt

John ........... Proverbs 17:28

[Mac from NS]

13. It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to say something and remove all doubt

moms the word

[Russell F]

I think number 14 should be....

14. Listen to your mother, because she IS right....


If i had listened to my mother i'd probably gotten in a alot less trouble and done alot better for myself...LOL

[beaconlight]

Russell F Me too but I wouldn't have half the fun. My mother almost cost me a wife, before we were married she asked Beverly"DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GETTING IN TO". Glad bev didn't listen.

bill

[Russell F]

Same with me and my wife beacon, and my wife reminds me occasionly. "...If i had listened to your mother i wouldn't have to put up with you...". But after some events recently, when my wife went above and beyond, my mother, altho not openly admited maybe she misjudged her when we first got married.

Really makes ya feel good when ya momma says you did something right for once...but she followed with a lecture on something else so the feeling didn't last long...


Russell

[beaconlight]

Mom called Beverly the daughter she never had. They were thick of theives. Mom always remeinded me how lucky I was to have a woman the would put up with me. It is a wonder my mother didn't go to drink. I gave her more trouble than my 3 brothers combined.

Bill

[W6NZ]

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket;
And the safest.

[John(videodoc)]

i got a 13 page letter after i married my wife, from mummy, telling me how she was the wrong one for me. and everything that was wrong with it. and how she was just after my money. (what money, shes makes twice what i make). anyway. 14 yrs later, still married, several college degrees later for both of us.

shes speaking a different tune now adays.